Greg Fitzsimmons is an American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer and radio host. We recently had the opportunity to ask Greg a few questions concerning his views on America for an interview series entitled, “Home of the Brave,” featured in our July print issue Leveled Magazine:
“These questions have been answered by my eight-year-old, Josephine, and my eleven-year-old, Owen.”- Greg
Leveled Magazine: What does being an American mean to you?
Josephine: Being hip, very modern; new and unique.
Owen: To be a little isolated from the rest of the world. Like we are an infant and the rest of the world is old people.
Define the American dream.
Josephine: Nothing. I don’t know what that means. Big question mark.
Owen: For most people it is a pack of Bud Light. For most people it’s having beach parties all over the coast and being successful and rich.
Josephine: People are different but some like to get up every morning very early and do what they love like word hard. Some like to sleep in and just get McDonald’s every day and get fat.
What’s one thing about life in this country that has had a significant effect on you, or has shaped you as an individual?
Josephine: Nothing has really happened. Nothing that big has happened to me yet. I’m still young. Since I’m around Latinos a lot now I can speak Spanish and now I can speak to other people.
Would you say that we live in the greatest country in the world?
Josephine: Yes. It’s very sunny here so you get a lot of chances to go to a pool or the beach. We have a lot of funny people and we are very accomplishing.
Owen: We’re doing very good financially. We’re not poor like other countries. Everyone else isn’t as up to date as us.
What would America’s grave say on it?
Josephine: Award winning, best country in the world. Served its country well.
Owen: A patriotic, giving and very kind country. Gave people a second chance.
What comes to mind when you think of the American people?
Owen: Fat men with their shirts off. A fat guy wearing a cheesy Hawaiian shirt. We don’t have as much high class as the other countries.
What will life in this country be like in a hundred years?
Owen: Probably more weight loss. No cancer. I don’t know if there will still be a president. Maybe there will be a Master Lord.
Josephine: People won’t know the definition of the words we used. They will just teleport places or take trains. All the things like ancient tombs will be gone and fallen to dust. The Eiffel Tower will have a twin.
What does patriotism mean to you?
Owen: It’s a soldier doing whatever for your country.
Josephine: Loving where you are means loving who you are.
What advice would you give to a younger you about building a life in America?
Josephine: I don’t know yet because I haven’t built a life. Work hard to get what you like but it will be easy because this is such a supportive country.
Owen: *(Had no advice because he had already left the room saying he was bored).